Tiresias via iambic tetrameter…

I am doing remedial accumulation of cultural capital – (having done Bill Shakespeare, Sherlock Holmes and the New Testament I’ve moved on to other fiction – Ovid’s Metamorphoses.

Mostly this stuff goes in one eye and out the other, because you don’t use it so much in Day to Day life. Occasionally though, it’s sooo cool (Phaethon’s Ride) that it sticks, or you know you will go back to it.

And sometimes I dash out some doggerel (usually iambic tetrameter) because, well, I can. Here’s my take on Tiresias… slightly tidied metrically (but it’s still doggerel!!)

So Jove and Juno fooling ‘round

And Jove complained “I sweat the pound;

I bet you dames enjoy the fuck

More than men.” “Boy, don’t press your luck”

said the horny J; “ask Tiresias.”

(He’d had and been a piece of ass;

He’d found two snakes a-writhing on t’job

And ‘tween the two a stick did lob

And for that crime he’d been a bint

For seven years he’d served a stint.

And then he’d seen the snakes once more

And begged reversal [a dick to score]

Tiresias knew of what ‘he’ spoke)

He told the truth – and Juno choked

She tore his eyes out one by one

A tragic end to a non-binary ‘son.’

Now Jove  could not this deed undo 

A consolation prize did he brew

And “foresight” did Jove give to him

That’s no good, in fact it’s grim!