Viz Vocabulation – “scrolletariat”

So, a few things about me: I have had letters published in the London Review of Books, Private Eye, the Financial Times, the Guardian, various lefty publications (New Internationalist, Peace News (RIP) etc). And in Viz.

Viz, for those of you who haven’t had the pleasure is an “adult” (scatalogical etc rather than pornographic) magazine, with a mix of comic strips (the Fat Slags, Sid the Sexist, Cockney Wanker, and one-offs). It also has a great “profanisaurus” – profane thesaurus – suggested by readers and mostly on the usual bodily functions (“menage a moi” being a personal favourite.

Another thing about me – and this will shock you – is that I have been over the last few years been keeping relatively accurate notes on new words encountered during my copious (well, compulsive) reading. This is my “vocabulation” file. There’s a project brewing there…

So the Viz and Vocabulation collided yesterday when I bought a copy (my subscription lapsed) and… loved it. A lovely silly one page cartoon of “Gout Carter” – Michael Caine being tough but with gout….

And three, count ’em, three, words

From “Foodie Bollocks” (p.15) crostini

Crostini (lit. ’little crusts’; sg.: crostino) are an Italian appetizer (antipasto) consisting of small slices of grilled or toasted bread^[1] and toppings.^[2] The toppings may include a variety of different cheeses, meats, vegetables, and condiments, or may be presented more simply with a brush of olive oil and herbs or a sauce.

Along with bruschetta, crostini are thought to originate in medieval times, when it was typical for peasants to eat their meals on slices of bread^[2] instead of using ceramics.

From “Mrs Brady Old Lady” (p.18) – saponification

Wet chemicals contain a specifically formulated extinguishant that reacts with oil to form a soapy substance through a process called saponification. When applied to burning liquids, the saponification process cools and emulsifies, extinguishing the flame and sealing the surface to prevent reignition.

and (drumroll please) from the Profanisaurus (p.41)- scrolletariat

scroll-etariat n. the largely comatose plebeian masses whose reading material is restricted to their social media feeds.

On one level this is straightforward class-based contempt (as per the word “chav”), but if you pause for a second, you realise that know plenty of “middle-class” people with “good educations” who have become scroll-etariat, through idleness and unearned smugness, hopelessness, lack of structures and frameworks.

We are fubarred, but while we wait for the rest of the shit to hit the fan, we have Viz and vocabulation, I guess.